Workplace Mental Health Lecture

The essence of maintaining mental health in the workplace is never to force yourself to give up emotions and become a so-called "emotionally stable adult", but to set up an emotional buffer zone that suits you - even if you cried at the company today and cursed the demander in front of the empty conference room for ten minutes, as long as the buffer zone is not broken, it is not considered psychologically out of control, let alone self-condemnation.

Last week, I met a young girl from an Internet operation position whom I worked with before. She changed eight versions of the 618 activity plan in a row, and the client finally chose the first version. She couldn't hold back tears on the subway after get off work, and had to hold her breath for fear of being looked at by others. When she got home, she read the chicken soup of "get rid of emotions in the workplace," and in turn scolded herself for being pretentious and having poor ability to withstand stress. I looked through her physical examination report at that time and found that the thyroid nodules had increased from Category 3 last year to Category 4a. The doctor specifically told her to be less angry and to hold back her emotions. But she was lucky and first put herself in the shackles of being "emotionally unqualified".

Now there are actually two mainstream schools regarding psychological adjustment in the workplace. No one is right or wrong, and the target groups are completely different. Academics even more advocate the idea of ​​cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT). When encountering negative emotions, they first break it down into three layers: "the incident - my interpretation - subsequent behavior." For example, in the incident with the girl just mentioned, the incident itself was "the client chose the original plan", and her interpretation was "my life in the previous week was all in vain" If I do it, the boss will definitely think that I am not capable." The subsequent behavior is self-attack, and the core of the adjustment is to replace the interpretation logic: "The essence of the process of revising the 8th version is to help the customer eliminate 7 wrong directions that he himself did not think clearly about. The final choice of the first version shows that my initial judgment was correct." This method is especially suitable for people who are prone to overthinking and habitually blame all problems on themselves. After breaking it down a few times, you will find that a lot of anxiety is simply caused by yourself.

The other is the "border school" idea that is most commonly used in enterprise EAP services. It doesn't bother you about what to think at all, and directly teaches you to draw the boundary between work and yourself: you don't need to reply to non-urgent work messages after get off work. For demands that exceed the job responsibilities, just say "I can't take it because the schedule is over." If there is a problem with the project, find the person responsible first, and don't self-examination as soon as it comes up. A technical guy I worked with before is a typical example. He used to learn CBT on the Internet to dissect emotions, and the more he dismantled them, the more annoying he became - he is not a person who likes to think about emotions. He thought about "why am I angry" for ten minutes, and his mind was full of unfinished code, which is not as good as I walk around the park next to the company for 20 minutes after get off work every day, scolding idiots for demanding stupid products, and then go home and have hot pot. This is the benefit of the boundary method. You don’t have to compete with emotions, and the source of emotions is directly blocked from your life.

Oh, by the way, I would like to respond to the question that many people are debating, "Can you complain to your colleagues in the workplace?" One group says that complaining will spread negative emotions, and the more you complain, the more annoying it becomes. The other group says that complaining is a necessity. I have seen several girls just complaining about their boss during lunch with colleagues in the same department, which suddenly brought the anxiety level back from the early warning line to the normal level. The essence still depends on your own feelings: if you feel refreshed after vomiting, then find a colleague with no conflict of interest to vomit. If you feel trapped by negative emotions after vomiting, then find another outlet. Play two games and run two laps. There is no standard answer.

I have been working as an HRBP for an Internet company for five years, and I have seen too many people copying other people's methods but causing problems: Some people force themselves to meditate for 15 minutes every day, but when they meditate, their minds are filled with unfinished OKRs, which makes them more anxious.； Some people imitate others to be tough in their leadership. As soon as they turn around, they are afraid of being put in the wrong shoes, and they suffer from insomnia for a week in a row. There is really no need to force yourself to meet other people's "health standards." Survey data from the National Health Commission in 2023 show that the detection rate of depression and anxiety in the workplace is 21.5%. Almost one in five people is experiencing emotional problems. If you occasionally feel out of breath at work, it is really not that you are fragile, but that the general environment has problems. Don't bear the blame for everything.

Oh, by the way, if you really feel like you can't stand it lately, don't take it hard. There's nothing shameful in going to the hospital's psychology department for a consultation. Several of my colleagues have gone there. The medicines prescribed by the doctor, combined with adjustments to your work and rest schedule, are more effective than any chicken soup for the soul. There are actually no rules that you must abide by what I said today. If you feel tired of going to work, no one can say you are wrong if you go downstairs to buy a cup of iced milk tea and fish for ten minutes - after all, work is for living a good life, not for stuffing yourself up, right?