Dimensions of emotion regulation

The core can be divided into Physiological arousal regulation, cognitive evaluation regulation, behavioral expression regulation The third category, and whether "social support adjustment" is an independent dimension is still controversial in academic and practical circles, and there is no unified conclusion.

Let’s talk about a real case that I just encountered last week: Xiao Xia, a 26-year-old Internet operator, spent two nights changing the 618 activity plan, but was slapped back by her boss early in the morning. The reason was that the client she was working with had temporarily changed her KPIs the night before, and no one had synchronized it with her. She carried her computer downstairs to buy water, and found that her shared bicycle parked downstairs had been swept away. Under the 38-degree sun, she squatted on the roadside and shed tears.

If you observe carefully, you will find that when people are emotionally high, their first reaction is basically physiological: the heartbeat soars to 120, the face is hot, the hands are shaking uncontrollably, the throat is tight, and it is difficult to speak clearly. Xiaoxia's first subconscious action at that time was to rush into a convenience store and buy a bottle of ice-cold Coke. She drank half of the bottle, then pinched herself hard twice. It took two minutes for her to recover and breathe normally. This is the "physiological arousal regulation" that is most easily perceived by ordinary people - this dimension was first studied separately by the behaviorist school. This group of scholars even believed that the essence of emotion is a series of physiological reactions of muscles, internal organs, and nerves. As long as the physiological level is brought back to the calm baseline, the emotion will naturally calm down. The deep breathing method, 5-4-3-2-1 grounding method, and washing your face with cold water when it comes to emotions are all practical methods in this dimension that are now widely circulated on the Internet. However, the cognitive school has always complained that this method "treats the symptoms but not the root cause": This time you used iced Coke to suppress the fire. If you encounter the same thing next time, you should explode or explode.

It's interesting to say that after Xiaoxia recovered, the first thought that came to her mind was "Why am I so useless and can't do anything well" - you see, it was obviously a probability event that the boss forgot to synchronize the message and the bike was scanned. Half a dime for these two things had nothing to do with her. She subconsciously took the blame on herself, and the grievances she had just suppressed surged up again. This process of subjective attribution and judgment of what happened is the core of "cognitive evaluation regulation". Later, I went through the timeline of the whole thing with her, listing which ones were other people's problems and which ones were accidents. She stared at the list for three seconds, then suddenly breathed a long sigh of relief and said, "Oh, yes, I just got into trouble." There is also controversy about this dimension. The CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) school regards cognitive regulation as the core of emotional regulation. It believes that all negative emotions essentially come from irrational cognition. If the cognition is corrected, the emotion will be fine. ； However, practitioners of the mindfulness school do not agree with this statement at all. They feel that there is no need to rush to adjust your cognition. You can just allow yourself "I just feel useless now, it's okay, I will stay with this emotion for a while." Without judgment or correction, the adjustment effect can also be achieved. Clinical tracking data in the past few years also shows that there is no significant difference in the long-term intervention effects of the two methods.

Xiaoxia didn't force herself back to work that day. She and her supervisor took two hours off. First, she went to the park to feed stray cats for half an hour, and then went to the arcade to play taiko drums for 20 minutes. She put all her suffocation on the drums. When she left the arcade, she said she felt that the stone in her chest that had been blocked for a long time was finally gone. This way of relieving and transforming emotions through active choice of behavior is the third core dimension of "behavioral expression regulation." Practitioners in areas such as expressive art therapy and dance therapy pay special attention to this dimension. They believe that emotions are essentially unreleased energy. If it is blocked in the body, it is better to find a harmless channel to discharge it. ； However, many researchers have objected, believing that uncontrolled emotional venting will strengthen the corresponding neural pathways - for example, if you throw something every time you get angry, the threshold for anger will be lower and lower next time, and it will be easier to lose control. Therefore, in practice, it is generally recommended to adhere to the bottom line of "not hurting yourself, not hurting others, and not damaging property" when venting emotions.

As for the controversial item "social support adjustment" mentioned earlier, Xiaoxia herself has actually experienced it: when she was squatting on the roadside crying, the aunt selling cold shrimps next to her handed her a spoonful of cold shrimps and said, "Little girl, don't bask in the sun when it's hot, come and eat something cold." She later told me that her tears stopped immediately at that moment, and she felt no longer aggrieved. Many practical workers who are rooted in the community and provide psychological services believe that kindness from strangers, taking the initiative to talk to friends, and talking to counselors should be regarded as independent dimensions of emotional regulation. After all, when ordinary people encounter emotional problems, their first reaction is not to figure out how to adjust their physiological cognition, but to find someone to talk to. ； However, most academic researchers do not recognize this classification. They believe that social support is only an external trigger, and ultimately works through the three internal dimensions of physiology, cognition, and behavior, and cannot be regarded as an independent regulatory dimension. The two sides have been arguing about this matter for nearly ten years, and there is still no unified conclusion.

I have been doing clinical consultation for almost 7 years, but I rarely deliberately adjust the adjustment methods of visits to a certain dimension. When someone comes to visit who has an acute panic attack, I first ask him to do the grounding method to regulate his physiology. He doesn’t even know a single word of truth. ； When someone comes to visit who has been PUA for a long time, I will accompany him to scold his trash ex for two hours, let him vent his emotions first, and then slowly process his thoughts. ； If the visitor just doesn't want to talk today, take him to the sand table room to scoop sand for half an hour. He won't have to talk about anything and his mood will calm down. In fact, to put it bluntly, there is no standard answer to the matter of emotional regulation. Dimension division is only a research tool for scholars, not a rule for ordinary people to follow. Just like if you have heatstroke, you can drink Huoxiang Zhengqi water, you can hide in an air-conditioned room for half an hour, or you can shave yourself. Whatever makes you feel comfortable is an easy-to-use method. There is no need to stick to any dimension, right?